Friday, May 30, 2008

May 19th....

There's two things I know for sure:
She was sent here from heaven and she's daddy's little girl.
As I drop to my knees by her bed at night
She talks to Jesus and I close my eyes and
I thank God for all the joy in my life
Oh, but most of all for butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer;
sticking little white flowers all up in her hair;
"Walk beside the pony, Daddy, it's my first ride."
"I know the cake looks funny, Daddy, but I sure tried."
In all that I've done wrong I know I must have done
something right to deserve a hug every morning and butterfly kisses at night.

Sweet 16 today
She's looking like her mama a little more everyday
One part woman, the other part girl.
To perfume and make-up from ribbons and curls
Trying her wings out in a great big world.
But I remember Butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer; sticking little white flowers all up in her hair.
"You know how much I love you, Daddy, But if you
don't mind I'm only gonna kiss you on the cheek this time.
"With all that I've done wrong I must have done
something right to deserve her love every morning and butterfly kisses at night.

All the precious time
Like the wind, the years go by.
Precious butterfly. Spread your wings and fly.

She'll change her name today.
She'll make a promise and I'll give her away.
Standing in the bride-room just staring at her.
She asked me what I'm thinking and I said "I'm not sure-I just feel like I'm losing my baby girl.
"She leaned over...gave me butterfly kisses with her mama there,
Sticking little white flowers all up in her hair
"Walk my down the aisle, Daddy-it's just about time."
"Does my wedding gown look pretty, Daddy? Daddy, don't cry!"
Oh, with all that I've done wrong I must have done something right.
To deserve your love every morning and butterfly kisses-

I couldn't ask God for more, man this is what love is.
I know I gotta let her go, but I'll always remember
every hug in the morning and butterfly kisses.


It all began one day, September 30th, 1977 to be exact…he saw me and he said, “She’s what I always wanted.” And I’m sure that I saw him and thought the same exact thing. From the earliest time I can remember, he was there, loving me, providing for me and just being the best Daddy a little girl could ask for.

I know that some of you might think that I’m a spoiled little girl, but my Daddy (and Mama) wanted me (and Courtney) to have anything and everything within reason. He was always there for us – always participated in every aspect of our lives. Sometimes he would check me out of school early to go shopping - he was a good shopper and it showed. He was always well groomed and well dressed, even cutting the grass. He always looked good. He taught me to always shop around and always look for a deal. Some of you might remember that little red Honda Civic that he bought me when I turned 16 – did you know he bought that little red Honda Civic not once, but twice? He bought it for me the first time and then 5 years later he bought it from me for my sister….what kind of deal was that? There are so many wonderful memories and things that we shared together and as a family – too many to list… Our home was a happy home. I always loved pulling up into the driveway at home. That feeling of knowing that Mama and Daddy were there and were excited that I was home, or that Courtney was home. And I knew that every time I pulled out of the driveway, Daddy watched me go and didn’t turn away until I was out of sight.

But some of my fondest memories of him are at the banks where he worked… my name was in lights when they got me in 77 at the bank. Then here in Georgia at Farmers & Merchants Bank in Senoia – I would go to work with him and play bank in the boardroom – I sat in the teller line with the girls. Then at Peachtree National Bank, BB &T, and Bank of Georgia, I always loved going there and just being his little girl that he showed off. Then there was First Coweta Bank…Poppa’s bank…this bank was special. This bank I showed extra special interest in because Daddy loved it so much. This bank was the bank that my little boy, Ethan got to play in. He, from the very beginning, knew how to push the handicap button to make the doors open, knew where Ms. Claudette’s goldfish was, knew how to operate the elevator and loved going upstairs to get fed by all the ladies there, knew big Heidi and little Heidi and that he could sucker both of them for suckers, knew he could play with all of Robin’s trinkets, and I’m sorry Mr. Barber, but several times we rigged your bubblegum machine so Ethan could put pennies in there instead of quarters….but most importantly he knew where Poppa’s office was and that he was waiting in there for him.

He loved his family so much and he loved the Lord and made sure that that was our focus. He was a wonderful Christian Son, Husband, Brother, Uncle, Daddy and Poppa – he was also a wonderful Christian friend to so many. And he was a wonderful father in law – he loved both Mark and Landon and was proud that his little girls had found incredible Christian men to take care of them and lead their households. He touched so many people’s lives and was a wonderful example for so many. He was honorable, respectful and was respected.

My Daddy was patient. My Daddy was kind. My Daddy did not envy, did not boast (except about his tv to his buddies), and was not proud. My Daddy was not rude, was not self-seeking, was not easily angered. My Daddy kept no record of wrongs. My Daddy did not delight in evil but rejoiced with the truth. My Daddy always trusted, always hoped and always persevered.

I’ve had to do things this week that I never thought I’d have to do, but they were all for him. I don’t know how I’m supposed to go on without him. I was Daddy’s little girl and I worshiped the ground he walked on. I don’t know how I’m supposed to make it without him, without hearing his voice, without holding his hand, without hugging his neck and without kissing him. I don’t want to forget anything about him, especially his laugh. I don’t want Ethan to forget riding his tractor and picking blueberries. I want to always make sure Nina knows how much she loved Poppa’s shoulder and how much he loved getting belly sugar from her. I know that with God’s help, and with the help of all of you here, we will all get through this. I don’t know how, but we will. Michael E. Justice was a fine man, the finest of men – there will never be another one like him. I will never forget him and I will love him with all my heart for the rest of my life. He’s home now.

32 comments:

Elizabeth S said...

Mandy, that was just beautiful. I am so sorry for your loss. You and your family are still in my prayers.

Marion said...

Mandy, I will never forget what a fine man your father was and nor will anyone else. I do not think that I have ever met a more stable, grounded individual that was also set such an excellent Christian example to all of us. I will also never forget the love he displayed for my children. It was an honor to have known him. You and yours are in our prayers.

Marion and Kathy

Ryan said...

You are in our prayers. What you wrote was beautiful. I have tears in my eyes.

David, Samantha and Kaori said...

Your family has been through so much and to think this is only the beginning. Continue to write. Writ down your memories, have Courtney and your mom write down their memories, so that you can always have them and read them to your children, just like you would a bed time story. You will not forget his laugh. It is etched in your mind and heart forever. I am sorry for your hurt. I am praying for you.

Stacia said...

I obviously didn't know your dad Mandy but he sounds like a wonderful man and I know he'll live on through you, your mom and sister.

I can't imagine what you guys are going through but I pray that the Lord will fill the void in your heart and that you find comfort knowing he's with Jesus. Hadley always reminds me that Heaven is better than here because he's got a table prepared for us and he thinks there is a big yard for football playing. If only we could have the simplicity of a 4 year old.

Sandra said...

Thank you so much for putting this on your blog. You know I love you and I assure you I will always remember the love and pride Mike always showed in you girls. Love, Sandra

Shannon said...

Mandy, there are no words that will help, but know that all of you are in our prayers and that we are here for you for whatever you might need. Love you and will talk to you soon.

Unknown said...

Love you Mandy!

lyla said...

mandy, that was the sweetest thing i have ever read. you and your family have been in my prayers.

Mom said...

My prayers are with you all! May our Lord bless and keep you and give you His peace.


Melody Koppe

Sheri Ellis said...

Mandy, I cried reading this as much as I did hearing it. Mike holds a special place our hearts, without him we wouldn't have each other or Austin. Oh, how he loved Austin; he treated him like family. We love you and are praying for you. (Charlotte and Courtney, I'm sure you are reading this too, we love you and are praying for you as well.)

The_Math_Teacher said...

Mandy, Courtney and Charlotte,
I am so sorry for your loss. My heart breaks for you. I want to share a few lines from a song I just listened to again.

"When you're broken in a million little pieces
And you're trying but you can't hold on anymore
Every tear falls down for a reason
Don't you stop believing in yourself
When you're broken "

Keep believing. Take it one day at a time. Remember that we are all here for you.

Love, Gayle Swafford

Unknown said...

Mandy,
I promise I will be watching out and taking care of your mama these next two weeks we're together. You and Courtney are so precious to be encouraging her to go. Call DH if you need my cell number. It will ring international and she can use it to call ya'll anytime she wants. Hugs to Mark, Ethan and Nina! Love you guys!!

Courtney said...

I love you guys so much and my heart aches for all of you. Your dad was a great man - I feel blessed to have known him. We are praying for you all...

Jodi Brinkley said...

There isn't a day that I don't think about or pray for you! We love you!

Candie Bowen said...

Mandy, I'm sorry to hear about your sad news. I've been praying for you & your family & will continue to do so.

Lindsay said...

Mandy, that was so beautiful. I can't imagine what your family must be going through, but you are all in our prayers.

Heather said...

Mandy-
That was a beautiful tribute to your Dad. You have been on my mind a lot...and in my prayers. I know what it's like to lose a Dad and I know this first year is going to be really hard. But like you said, God will help you through this. Only God & time will help you heal. Hang in there....I'm here for you....

Heather

Griner Mom said...

So sorry again for your hurt. You and your family are in my prayers so often. Your tribute to him was so beautiful and sincere. It definately brought tears to my eyes. Just think, someday we will all be home together forever!!!!

Bob said...

Mandy;

Ginny and I wish we could have been there with you and Cortney and Charlotte during this time of extreme struggle for you all. We did not hear about Mike until May 29th.

One thing that always helps me in times of struggle is "RO 8:18 I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. 19 The creation waits in eager expectation for the sons of God to be revealed." No matter how bad it seems, it can't compare with what all of you and Mike have waiting for you.

Another thing a preacher showed me is "COL 1:21 Once you were alienated from God and were enemies in your minds because of your evil behavior. 22 But now he has reconciled you by Christ's physical body through death to present you holy in his sight, without blemish and free from accusation-- 23 if you continue in your faith, established and firm, not moved from the hope held out in the gospel. This is the gospel that you heard and that has been proclaimed to every creature under heaven, and of which I, Paul, have become a servant." Jesus has reconciled us to God in order to present us to God unblimished. My thoughts are that Jesus said "Father, I present to you Mike Justice, a joint heir with me."

I hope these words of God bring you much comfort

Bob and Ginny Cox

Mommy of Boys said...

Praying for you, Mandy. So sorry to hear about your dad.

Love,

Karen

King Family said...

We love you all and you know we are praying for you every day. Your dad was a wonderful man and I will never forget him.

the robertsons said...

I am in awe of your courage. What you wrote was amazing, and I know your Dad is so proud of you and your family. You and your family have been and continue to be in our prayers.

The Unlikely Homeschooler said...

We are continually praying for your family!

Jana said...

I still can't read what you wrote without crying, and I have read it several times. Your Daddy was a wonderful man and I know you will miss him so much. I can't even imagine. You guys are continually in our prayers.

Gary, Megan and Beth said...

Mandy,
Just wanted to let you know that we are thinking of you and praying for you. There is not a day that goes by. That we don't think of you and your family. Gary and I thought the world of your dad. Mike Justice was a good christian man. Who really loved the Lord. I loved to hear him lead prayers at church. He is truly missed. We will take good care of your mom. We love you and your family. Let us know if we can help in anyway.
With all our love,
Gary and Megan

The Parker Family said...

Mandy,
I am so sorry about your loss. May God continue to comfort you and wrap his arms of love around you and your family. You will be in prayers.
Rebekah

Shannon and Andrew said...

Mandy, thank you for sharing that with us. We love all of you and you are in our thoughts and prayers every day. Please let us know if there is anything we can do for you or Charlotte. Mike blessed our lives and we will miss him.

Andrew, Shannon and boys

The Monsarrats said...

hi mandy, so good to read your blog of the memories of your dad. praying for you and your family during this difficult time. Praise God that He's sufficient to see ya'll through this time. jennifer monsarrat (phillips)

RoadRunner said...

Just letting you know that you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. If you need anything at all, don't hesitate to let me know. I am in Memphis quite often.

-Justin

Just Jen said...

Mandy, that entry was lovely. I am so sorry for the loss to your family, for you, your mom and Courtney. We love you all so much and are saddened that your dad is gone. He was a wonderful man and exuded this warmth, love and acceptance that I'll never forget. Our thoughts and love are with you always.
Jenifer and Jamie

moshieraj said...

Mandy, I am so sorry for your loss. What wonderful words to celebrate your dad's life. I am praying for you and your family